'I resent my painfully dull husband - seeing other couples makes me jealous'
A woman has opened up about resenting her husband as he very rarely makes an effort with her or the kids. She's devastated that the familoy never sees his happy, jokey side anymore.
She's explained that the relationship isn't 'nasty', but claims he's just a bit 'boring' and a 'bare-minimum kind of father' to their kids.
Recently, the pair took the kids away with another family and the other dad spontaneously bought all the kids ice creams and presents - but this left the woman feeling very jealous as her husband would not do the same.
Venting on Mumsnet, the woman added that she only gets to see him joke around for 'about 30 seconds every five years' as he is always so serious.
She says he is just a bare minimum type of dad (stock photo) (Getty Images)In the post, the woman, who remained anonymous, wrote: "No, I don't want to divorce him. He's not a nasty person, he's not done anything awful me. He's not abusive. He hasn't cheated, nor do I worry he will.
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"I wouldn't say he's a good father but I probably wouldn't say he's a bad father either, I suppose. He's a bare-minimum kind of father."
When they met she knew he was quite laid back but more grown up so she knew he would be dependable with things like paying bills - but he was not as 'dangerous' as previous men she had dated.
She wrote: "What I'm saying is. I'm finding life with him painfully boring. He's such a grump 100% of the time. Always scowling. Never fun. Never jokes with us. Never plays with the kids. Never seems to really enjoy them."
She was jealous when the other dad bought them all ice creams on holiday (stock photo) (Getty Images)"He was very into football and Lego as a kid, and we have two boys and they would love to play football with him in garden but he's always got an excuse. We recently went away with another family for a couple of days.
"The dad of the other family spontaneously bought all the kids, including ours a toy from the gift shop. Then on another day surprised them all with ice creams.
"Why can't my husband be like that? Generous, fun, keen to please the kids? Made me feel really jealous to be honest."
The woman says she knows her husband can be more happy and goofy but they never see it anymore and she does not know whether to bring this up with him. He now just works or reads the newspaper and never spends time with the kids or her.
She said: "Is this normal? Are all men like this and I'm just holding him to unrealistic expectations?"
In response, many commenters offered their advice to the frustrated woman.
One person wrote: "I don't think it's about changing his personality. It's about him not being fully a part of the family and leaving a lot of the emotional side of parenting to you."
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While another stated: "I think whether your relationship is viable or not is not based off the core compatibility but actually whether you are both able to value the other's contribution, discuss and agree a balance between both priorities and then both make real steps to show that you both value the other person's values!"
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