Man throws away 20-year marriage after wife's slip-up at school reunion

09 January 2024 , 09:19

1136 0

The husband discovered his wife had cheated when they were younger (Image: Getty Images/Image Source)

A devastated man has asked for advice after revealing that he is leaving his marriage of 20 years after finding out his wife cheated on him while he was at school.

There are few childhood sweethearts who make it through to marriage but one couple did just that and managed to enjoy 20 years of happiness together with two children, until he later discovered his wife had cheated on him in the early stages of their relationship.

To end such a long union for something that happened when they were so young, sounds a little petty at first glance but the defiant husband has revealed his heartbreak over the sad situation and why he just can't forgive his wife.

Sharing that they started dating when they were at high school, he in the juniors and his then girlfriend, who was a year older than him, in the seniors, he said that for the first two years she was at college, their relationship was long distance. He finished high school and did a year in community college until they both then went to the same college in the same city together for a year and have lived together ever since - getting married the summer after he graduated college.

Claiming that their marriage had been "pretty great" up until he made his grim discovery, he shared his story on Reddit and told how he came to find out about events from the past that had led him to leave his wife. He said just after Christmas they met up with some of her college friends to hang out and she told them they had met in high school, but didn't reveal they dated back then.

'I don't want children staying up late at weekends - I really need adult time'

"Her old college room commented that it was crazy that we met in high school, had a few wild years in college, then ended up together," he wrote about the incriminating conversation. "I played along and commented that I didn't know if my wife was as crazy as I was. The roommate started to tell a story, but my wife cut her off and said she was uncomfortable about it. I sensed something was up, so I said that we actually started dating in high school and were together for my wife's entire time at college."

After this his wife's friends went quiet and the atmosphere became "awkward" with one of them pulling him aside at the end of the night and advising him to have an "honest conversation" with her about the college years. He did just that in the car on the way home but she dismissed him saying it wasn't important.

He felt it was though and went to stay with his brother until she was ready to talk. The next day she admitted to sleeping with "several" men in the first two years of college but didn't think it was a big deal because they were long distance and she didn't think their childhood romance would last.

"I pressed for more details," he said, sharing more of the story, "and she said it was at least 10 different men including at least 3 guys she introduced to me as friends when I came to visit on weekends and 1 guy she was still in contact with."

The next day he started the paperwork for divorce but her family and most of his think he's stupid to throw away their marriage over a few mistakes. He believes their teenage children, who are 17 and 19, will understand why has made his decision.

"I've stood by my belief that cheating on me with multiple men for years is unacceptable no matter when it happened and the fact that she continued to maintain relationships with these guys right in front of me was an unacceptable amount of disrespect," he said as he asked if he was right to think this way.

The replies to his post were unanimous in their strength of feeling and most were utterly appalled at his wife's level of deceit.

"10 guys can no longer be described as a few mistakes," one said simply as another expanded, "This is where the complete disrespect comes in. She knew she was dating someone, whether she thought it was gonna last or not, she was introducing him to her sexual partners as just being friends and all knowing she was sleeping with them. It was 20 years ago but that amount of savageness would be hard to look past, especially when she still associates with the other men. That is just a continual slap."

"Ouch bro, I feel the pain. It's gonna take a lot to get over that level of betrayal," said a third as another agreed. "Yeah. I could prob get over some ons in college. But the level of disrespect? Even up to this day? I'd divorce her too."

Others doubted that she would have been faithful during their marriage either: "There's zero chance she's been monogamous during their 20 years of marriage," one claimed. "I certainly don't belive it. It would be strange if she just flipped a switch from one day to the next and suddenly became a loving and faithful girlfriend after behaving in a way that makes her friends feel bad for [him] when they found out he was her boyfriend during that period," agreed a second.