'My daughter's nursery keeps calling her by the wrong name - I'm seething'
What you name your child is entirely up to you and no matter what you choose you expect the people around you who have to interact with your baby to respect the moniker and use it. But can you control what nicknames your child is given by loved ones, other adults in their life, and their school friends?
That's the debate one mum has sparked online after she said she's furious at her daughter's nursery teachers for not calling her child by her given name or any of her pre-approved nicknames. The mum explained she named her daughter Matilda and loves the nicknames Tilly and Tilda, so was horrified to learn that the people at her nursery were calling her Mat.
In a post on Reddit, she said: "Daycare is using a name I dislike as a nickname for my daughter. I know we have no control over nicknames. I’m curious if I'm overthinking this. I have a baby named Matilda. She started daycare last week. We refer to her as Matilda, Tilly and Tilda.
"When I went to pick her up yesterday her teacher said 'Mat had a good day'. Thinking I might have misheard, I brushed it off. I dropped her off today and they said 'Miss Mat will have a great day'. That's when I noticed a few of her personal items were labelled with Mat too. How should I approach this? Or do I just try to get over it? She spends eight hours a day there and I really do not want her to get used to being called Mat … especially when Matilda has so many wonderful nicknames."
Commenters on the post were split, though. Some agreed that the mum should speak to the nursery and set the record straight so that they stop calling her Mat and start calling her Tilly, but others argued she had no say in what other people call her child, so long as it isn't rude. They pointed out that when her daughter is older she might hate the nickname Tilly, and it isn't up to her mum to decide what she prefers to be called.
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One person said: "Just flat out say: 'We don't care for the nickname Mat. Please call her Tilly'. Usually, the registration forms have a place for preferred nicknames," while another added: "I would definitely say something to the daycare, it's very reasonable to ask that your child is called the name you prefer," and a third posted: "Just mention to the daycare what your preferred nickname is for her. Nicely and kind of offhand."
But someone who disagreed with the mum stated: "Maybe it's because I don’t have kids but I think correcting them is unnecessary and a little obnoxious. She's a baby, they're not gonna know her forever. And people your child's whole life are going to choose nicknames for them that won't get run by you every time," and someone else said: "I didn't think you got to pick the nickname other people call you. You could say something if it really bothers you but it comes across as high maintenance to me."
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